Until next time...

How lucky am I to have something

that makes saying goodbye so hard.

Winnie the Pooh

What can I say? I'm not sure what to say. There's too much... 

Yesterday, our last day together, each of us shared insights we've gained from being here - in 6 minutes or less (I think very few of us stuck to that!). There were some touching moments, lots of laughter, and lots of insights. And although I was not one of the funny ones (I never am) - nor was I especially insightful - I thought I would share with you what I shared with everyone... 

My weekly lectio divina group... family.
7 AM every Wednesday.

My sharing from yesterday (slightly edited):

As you all know, synthesizing 11 weeks is not easy. I have grown a great deal in these weeks, but not in the ways I expected. Sometimes the most important learning happens outside the formal classroom, and the same is true for me. I have grown in profound ways that I will continue to unpack as time goes by. My assumptions have been challenged - I have been very reflective about what I've learned here about culture, about my own biases and prejudices, and all the things I still have to learn - and the time here has been deeply humbling for me, which I hope makes me a better, more patient, formator.  So, I thank each of you - the team, participants, guest speakers...

There are some concepts, though, related to the content that will stick with me. I think many things can be summed up with something Bro. Tim Driscoll said during week 5... our work is, "helping people in formation to move from an idea/ideal to something they live in their heart, something they embody, and something they can live in community." Communities that are warm, prayerful, and intercultural.

We are to accompany our folks in formation as they (and we) integrate what it is to be Marianist. It is not something that we do, but something that we are. The models of formation (especially the model of integration) give us a framework. And we need to be attentive to the fact that people have different models of formation - our community members, our formation teams, and even our formees - may have a different model of formation. We need to be attentive to that. We also need to be attentive to human formation/development so that we can accompany individuals instead of monolithic groups. 

Sr. Franca reminded us that the world in which we currently live is marked by BANI - bitterness, anxiety... it is non-linear and incomprehensible. This has an impact on what we do and how we go about it. So, we have to be discerning. Getting support from a mentor or a peer group is really important. As Sr. Marie Joëlle said, "An isolated Christian is a Christian in danger." We need that support so we can be people of "joy, conviction, and hope..." I wish I could remember who said that to us...

Ultimately - as many have said already - formation is the work of the Holy Spirit with Mary as model and guide. Our job is not to get in the way of what the Spirit is doing. May it be so.

This is what I shared with the group yesterday. It's imperfect, but it is a good overview of what I am carrying with me. More will unfold with time.

My heart is full, and at the same time, I am sad. I don't know when - or if - I will see any of these folks again. And, no, I'm not being dramatic. It's a fact. Our paths may not cross again. So, I will carry each of them in my heart.. until we meet again.

And now... I will allow myself a few tears. 
Many blessings,
Sr. N

Italy 2014… A great way to start the summer!

 A faithful friend is a sturdy shelter,

he who finds one finds a treasure.

A faithful friend is beyond price,

no sum can balance his worth.

A faithful friend is a life-saving remedy…

Sirach 6: 14-16a 

Currently, I am on a plane heading back to Dayton, Ohio from 10 days in Italy. Part work, part play… a great way to begin the summer. What a gift!

First, my meetings…. I am on a team of Marianists who have been asked to plan an international gathering of Marianists Brothers and Sisters that will happen in the summer of 2016. This gathering is called Horizons and it is a 25-day formation program for those who have been perpetually professed for 1 to 10 years. The planning team consists of 2 Brothers from the US, 1 Brother from Spain who is a priest, 1 Brother from Kenya and me. We are quite the group – diverse skill sets and backgrounds, different ways of working on projects, and very different personalities. But, we did very well together and I look forward to our next meeting in July 2015.

The Horizons team celebrates Mass in the crypt of St. Peter's. 

I decided to stick around for a few days after the meetings to spend time with friends… One of our Sisters (my former novice director) from the US serves on our General Administration in Rome, 2 friends of mine are Marianist seminarians living in Rome, and another American Marianist Brother serves as vice rector for the seminary. We had a great time! A day in Florence… a day touring Rome… a close encounter with Pope Francis… and a day in Assisi. What a week!

There were many highlights from my time there. To list them all would be too much – and perhaps a little boring for the reader. However, on this trip I can say that I did gain a little insight. Allow me to share some of these (in no particular order)…

1.     Churches, parks, museums, oh my!

Some people are thrilled by big cities – all the sights, sounds, impressive buildings, and fast moving people going a thousand different directions. Big cities are fine and I can enjoy them. However, when I’m in one I always crave or seek out the places that offer some sort of refuge from the noise – Churches, parks, museums… or an out of the way café/restaurant somewhere.

On this trip to Italy I didn’t get to any museums… there were too many Churches to see! But I saw some magnificent Churches… St. Peter’s, St. Maria Maggori, the Duome in Florence, St. Maria degli Angeli outside of Assisi…  However, it’s not all the gold or the size that impresses me. It’s the smaller, quiet places that bring a sense of peace. Take St. Alphonsus Liguori for example. No tourists. No crowds. Just quiet pews with people praying. The image of Mary there is the original icon of Our Lady of Perpetual Help. It’s a beautiful icon and a lovely place for prayer. Or St. Maria di Trastevere… also a quiet Church and the only place I’ve seen an image of Jesus with his arm (apparently) around Mary’s shoulders.

St. Alphonsus Liguori

Santa Maria di Trastevere

One afternoon my friend, Bob (one of the seminarians), and I walked in a park in Rome I had no idea existed - the Villa Borghese. This was after our visit to St. Alphonsus Ligouri. Anyway, the park, set on a hill with beautiful views of the city down below, is a true gem. There were not a whole lot of people there. Maybe because it had rained most of the morning, but regardless… I was happy to know a place like that exists in Rome – fresh air, beautiful trees, away from many of the tourists… I highly recommend it.

The view of Rome from Villa Borghese.

2.     Some places are holy and there’s no other way to describe them.

My favorite place by far was Assisi. The place oozes peace. It’s a small, quaint kind of place – more like a village than anything – set in the mountains of Italy’s Umbria region. Walking through the city and its Churches felt like walking through a museum and a park. There was an overwhelming calm that set in while praying at the tomb of St. Francis… taking in the breath-taking beauty of the hillside… walking up and down the narrow cobblestone streets… praying in the tomb of St. Clare and before the San Damiano cross (in front of which St. Francis received his call). It is difficult to describe. I will visit Assisi again someday. Maybe then I can find the words to describe it.

Assisi

3.     Being in close proximity to someone “famous” can cause a serious  case of being star-struck

Pope Francis is a good example of that. Bob and I went to the audience on Wednesday morning. We had fantastic seats right on the aisle (because we arrived 3 hours before the audience was scheduled to start). The Pope drove by us not once, but twice. And I mean… very close. I couldn’t speak. I barely remembered that I was trying to take a picture or video. And I almost cried because I was so excited.

What a great morning this was! (excuse the finger at the top…) :) 

4.     There is such a thing as a social introvert. But there is a limit…

For many years people have questioned whether or not I am really an introvert. Being a person who enjoys spending time with friends, people confuse that with extroversion. It’s not. There is such a thing as a social introvert – I am one. And there comes a definite point at which I hit my wall and maybe speak 2 words in the space of an hour. I suppose that’s appropriate if you’re headed to Assisi for the day… but a little unfortunate for the travel companions.  

5.     Thirty-nine years old feels the same as thirty-eight as did thirty-seven.

While in Italy I turned 39 years old. THIRTY-NINE! One more year of my 30s left. This is about the time that most people call “midlife,” (well between 39 & 45). Seriously? I hardly feel older than 30! And yet, here I am. I am older. Wiser? Who knows? One can hope, I suppose.

One great thing about my birthday happening while I was in Rome with many different people is that I celebrated it at least 3 different times. Our meetings were held at the General Administration community of the Marianist Brothers in Rome, which also houses the seminary community. The second night we were there the seminarians were celebrating the June birthdays. Being the hospitable people they are, they included me in the celebration. I have a card and a picture of the seminary community – so that I remember to pray for them. … Our meetings ended the day before my birthday. So the team with which I was working went out to a neighborhood pizzeria to celebrate. Then on my actual birthday I traveled to Florence (or Firenze as it is known in Italy) with 3 wonderful people. It was a fantastic way to begin my last year as a 30-something.

6.     I am naturally a skeptical person – especially when it comes to legend and lore.

Some people might call this cynicism. I don’t think that’s accurate. While in Rome I saw many things that made me roll my eyes and say “Really?” To be honest with you, I feel a little guilty about it. 

7.     I must ask 1000s of questions everyday – not all of them are spoken out-loud.

When I was in middle school my classmates teased me some. One of the names I was called was “Pinocchio.” Not because I lied, but because people thought I was nosey and asked too many questions.  Yes, I know this doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but they were middle school children. Often as middle school kids we did not make sense… and often we were unkind.

Anyway, at some point my filter got a little stronger. Well, to make a long story shorter I think the pendulum swung too far in the other direction. So, my inquisitive nature only comes out when I’m in a very comfortable situation. Then I ask more questions per hour than most people ask in a day… “What’s the symbolism of that?” “What is the translation of that word?” “Why would someone do thus-and-such when it’s not logical?” “What does that statue represent?” “How come all the cars are hatchbacks?” “How long has this Church been here?” “What’s the derivation of that word?” “Why are there booths on the shore of the Tiber (or Tevere as the Italians call it)?” “What’s that building?” “What were those ruins?” “Who is that poet?” “Who wrote that?” “What’s story behind that painting?” I want to know and to understand everything, it seems. It’s insatiable, really. (Too bad my memory holds on to almost nothing of the information I am told)

Yes. This is a part of who I am. I’ve come to accept it. I hope that I don’t drive too many people crazy! And if I do, these people should be thankful that not all of my questions actually get verbalized.

But here’s a question that must get asked… See the picture below:

What does this sign mean???

I saw 3 or 4 signs like this walking back to the train station from San Damiano in Assisi. Can anyone please tell me what it means? It’s driving me crazy…

8.     Friends are a gift from God and important for a person's well-being.

This statement is self-explanatory. I am extremely grateful for the wonderful people in my life that I am blessed to call friend. And although I do not have the opportunity to talk with them as much as we would like and I don't have the opportunity to see some of them very often, they are a great blessing to me. I should tell them that more often…

I tried for 10, but came out with 8. That’ll have to do. :)

Many blessings on all who read this!

Sr. N

Gratitude for 2013

In all circumstances, give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Grace and peace to you today!

It's been a while since I've sat down to type a few thoughts here in my blog. This is certainly not because I've run out of things to say! You may know that when I write, I'm fairly verbose. It's more because my life is much more full than it was when I began this blog. Those of you who have been reading my blog for a while may recall that I started this blog when I was a first year novice. Back then I blogged nearly once a week about my prayer life, what I was reading, living in community etc. It's now been about 7 1/2 years since I began this blog (under a different name) and life has changed a great deal.

Being that today is the last day of 2013, I've been reflecting this morning on the gifts and blessings of the year gone by. It's been year full of travel, wonderful people, extended moments of silence, deep prayer, deepening in my understanding of my various roles etc. And I've composed a list of  moments/lessons/events/people for which I am grateful. I thought I would share. By the way, these are in no particular order.

1. Friends
I am grateful for the many people in my life who challenge me to see things from a different perspective. Those who offer support when I feel overwhelmed by life. The ones with whom we share with one another our struggles, joys, hopes and dreams. The people who send random texts just to give me an update on their lives or to say they prayed for me that day. Many of these people do not live in the same city that I do and it is often difficult to maintain friendships across the miles (at least, that's true for me). However, there are those with whom the friendship is very well maintained. I am grateful for these people.

2. Saying "no" can feel very selfish at the moment, but sometimes it is the best thing - for everyone.
Of course, this is not a new lesson for me. In fact, it is one that I seem to learn over and over again. I suppose I'm a slow learner. Somewhere in my life I learned that to be a "good person" you had to say yes to everything that is good and everything that might be helpful to others. Serving on a committee? That's a good thing to do -  "yes." Giving a talk at a conference? That's a good thing to do - "yes." There are more good things/opportunities in this world than any one person should ever say yes to. Sometimes, it is better to say no - even though it might feel selfish or self serving. Because what can happen if someone is over-scheduled with many good things, is that that person can no longer do a good job at any of them - something has to give. And if the only person "hurt" was the person who says yes to everything, it wouldn't be as big of a deal. But, often others lose something also. Lesson learned? Goodness, I hope so.

3. "Pope hope" (as one of our Sisters often puts it)
Over this past weekend a friend of mine said, "You have a crush on the Pope!" And I, with head bowed, replied, "Yes. Yes, I do." I have always been drawn towards people who challenge me to be better in ways I had not previously considered. No one is challenging me more these days than Pope Francis. The more I read of what he's written or said, the more I feel called to conversion of heart. Conversion in my attitudes towards ministry. Conversion in my prayer life. Conversion in the way I live the vow of poverty. Conversion in the way I care for the poor and the marginalized of our communities. Lately, I've been reading (and praying with) the Pope's Apostolic Exhortation, Evangelii Gaudium. It seems that every word of this document cuts right to the heart and is causing me to ask some serious questions of myself. The true test will be, however, whether or not the document propels me to some sort of action beyond myself. That's the true test of conversion, no?  

4. The summer of 2013 
There are no words to capture the grace that was the summer of 2013. I am not sure there has ever been a time in my life that I have felt more grounded, free, at peace, and filled with joy. There was a 30-day retreat that brought me into deeper relationship with Jesus and with Mary - and a greater commitment to the Marianist mission. There was the celebration of my 38th birthday with some of my closest friends. There was the day I walked MILES all over San Francisco with one very close friend and one new friend. Then there was the time spent with about 70 other "young nuns" - deep in conversation about charism and the future, dancing for hours with no shoes on (and very sore muscles the next day!), praying together and having a blast. There were the days spent at Indian Lake with other "younger" Marianists - praying night prayer on a boat in the middle of the lake as the sun set will always be a highlight of those days - as well as Marianist karaoke and late night conversations under the stars. All of this was capped off by the celebration of my perpetual vows in August. What a glorious weekend that was! So full of joy. Definitely a wonderful way to bring an end to a summer full of grace.

5. 2013 was the year of publicity… I'm not a fan.
With newspaper articles, magazine interviews, photo shoots, and sharing my bio numerous times, it seemed that my picture and my story were "everywhere" (at least in my small world) for a while. This has never been true in my life until 2013.  And, I think I will be happy if it is not a major part of my life moving forward. The most awkward thing was the photographer who came to CJ to take pics for St. Mary's Univ. alumni magazine. I have never been so uncomfortable in my life! My students in my 5th period class seemed very amused, though. The lesson here? That's not the kind of life I want to live - I much prefer being under the radar.

6. Retreat work seems to be in my blood
In the spring of 1990 I attended my first retreat. From 1990 until this very day I have had a hand in planning and/or attending more than 5 retreats a year. I have come to the realization this year that this part of my life is probably not going away any time soon. Not that I ever wanted it to, but I suppose I assumed that I would "grow out of it" or "move on." Nope. It's in my blood. And I think it's a good thing.

7. Ideas and dreams are good things. However, bringing them to fruition may not happen or may not happen in my way or with my timing. And that's okay.
When I dream - when I think about the future - I tend to dream big. For the most part, in my everyday life, I am a realist - fairly practical and objective. However, every once in a while an idealistic side of me takes over and with wide-eyes and a bit of naiveté I want to change the world. My response to those who are more realistic than me is often, "Why not?" or "Who says I/we can't do thus-and-such?" And while there is a time and a place for such wide-eyed idealism, there is also a need for the balance of realism. That's a bitter pill to swallow for someone like me. But, it reminds me that I'm not actually the one in charge - thank you, God! I am grateful to those who do not laugh at the ridiculousness of my dreams, but gently pull me back down to earth and reality. But, the dreams are still there. And who knows. Maybe someone else will bring them to fruition at a later time. Or not. And that's okay.

8. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
With that being said, sometimes even when an idea seems preposterous or when the roadblocks seem insurmountable, we may be called to do it anyway. Trusting in God and taking a risk on an impossible dream may sometimes be what we are called to do. Of course, there is a certain amount of discernment that has to go into this. But, if one never tries… never steps out of the box… never takes a risk… then one will never know what could happen. This was made more evident to me in the purchasing and establishing of our discernment community, Annunciation House. Sometimes, you just need to take a risk - and trust that God will guide, provide and sustain.

9. Never underestimate people's capacity for generosity.
In relationship to #8 I would be remiss if I did not mention how grateful I am for the generosity of so many people in helping us establish Annunciation House. From all those who gifted us with dishes and bedding… small appliances and gift cards… to those who gave innumerable hours in cleaning walls, power washing the deck, moving furniture, etc. We are so very grateful. Personally, I was overwhelmed with people's generosity. I still am when I sit back and consider how much was given to us and how much practical support we received. Thank you all!

10. Community.
This year I am grateful for community. We are small, but that's okay. It allows for flexibility and deeper relationships. Perhaps it would be very difficult for someone to live in a community that is always in flux. However, I have found a lot of grace in that. We started with 2 - then we grew to 3. Now we are at 4 and may grow to 5 in 2014. And it's good. God has gifted us in many ways. It is a blessing to live in a community whose sole purpose is to be a place of discernment. Who doesn't need that in their lives, right?

And so, there you have it - random thoughts on the year 2013. Today I was considering the tradition of making New Years resolutions. I haven't done it in a long time. As of yet, I haven't made a decision about it for 2014. However, my hope is that in 2014 I will continue to learn and grow more and more into the person God created. Our world needs people who are perfectly themselves - it is only in this way that we can cooperate with God and one another in establishing God's kingdom.

Blessings of peace and joy to all who read this!
Sr. N

What is the peace for which we pray?

Peace is not the product of terror or fear. Peace is not the silence of cemeteries.

Peace is not the silent result of violent repression.

Peace is the generous, tranquil contribution of all to the good of all.

Peace is dynamism. Peace is generosity. 

It is right and it is duty

Oscar Romero, Martyred Archbishop of El Salvador

Today marks a month since my last blog post. There has been so much good and so many things that I've wanted to share with you through a blog post. The past several weeks have certainly brought their share of blessings : the beginning of the academic year - on 2 campuses, the growth of our community at Annunciation House of Discernment, thoughtful conversations with friends both near and far, and more about my summer adventures. Oh, so much to share with you!

However, today I find myself unable to focus on those things - as good as they are. No. Today I am contemplating peace and the lack thereof. Contemplating why there is so much trouble in human hearts, violence in many places of our world, young people in our schools and on our streets who do unthinkable acts of violence out of boredom (...or depression... or rage), the lack of respectful discourse in our political landscape... and the list goes on.

For many years these things have troubled and saddened me a great deal. This is not the way God intended our world to be. This is not the Kingdom of which Jesus said, "the Kingdom of God is in your midst." Don't get me wrong. There is a lot of good in the world and in my life. And for that, I am more grateful than words can adequately express. It is the good in our world and in human hearts that can allow us to hope. And "hope does not disappoint."

There is a saying, "The Kingdom of God is already and not yet." And while I've always understood this from an intellectual, theoretical point of view, I never thought much about the practical implications. But it is true. The Kingdom of God does exist here wherever there is goodness, love, compassion, faith and peace. But to the extent that there exists violence, hatred, war, oppression, indifference to the suffering of others, then the Kingdom has a long way to go.

In his Angelus address on Sunday, September 1, Pope Francis asked that all people of goodwill take tomorrow (Saturday, September 7) as a day of prayer and fasting for peace. He called us to be men and women of peace and to ask God to grant us the great gift of peace in our world. Indeed. However, what is this peace of which we speak? 

Pope Francis went on to state, "It is neither a culture of confrontation nor a culture of conflict which builds harmony within and among peoples, but rather a culture of encounter and a culture of dialogue; this is the only way to peace." A culture of encounter and a culture of dialogue. How can we begin to build this culture and promote its growth? Cultural change is never easy, nor is it swift. 

I am reminded of a song from GIA (the publisher of the ubiquitous Gather hymnals), Do Not Fear to Hope. Allow me to share with you a few lines:

Do not fear to hope! Though the wicked rage and rise. For God sees not as we see. Success is not the prize. Do not fear to hope! For though the night be long,the race shall not be to the swift, the fight not to the strong.

No. The culture of encounter and of dialogue that leads to lasting peace will not happen quickly - especially if we always seek to "win" or to "succeed." The win-lose mentality is not one that promotes peace. Nor is the culture of peace build by people who only seek their own success regardless of the implications for others. These mentalities are so prevalent all around us, but it is certainly not a hopeless situation...

If we feel it is hopeless, we are underestimating many things. One, we underestimate the power of prayer. Sometimes people become discouraged in prayer - "I prayed for thus-and-such and nothing happened." And perhaps it's true that a situation doesn't change immediately. But what always happens is that those who pray are changed - hearts are opened, insight given, courage and strength to continue to do the right thing.... Second, I believe we underestimate what a small group of people can bring about. Sociologist Margaret Mead once wrote, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." People say it so often that it's become cliche, but just because it's cliche doesn't mean it's not true. Lastly, it seems to me that people can sometimes underestimate what God can do. For what might seem impossible to us, is possible for God. Do we have the courage to trust that?

Tomorrow evening I will gather with faculty, staff, students and other Marianists (lay and religious) at the University of Dayton for a vigil for peace. And as we pray for peace in our troubled world and peace in human hearts, I will also pray that we not forget our role in building peace.  

Peace to the hearts of all who read this.

Sr. N

Life moves pretty fast. 

If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off 

(i.e. one of my favorite 80s movies)

March 1... March 1. ... Maybe if I keep repeating that, the reality will soak in...

Would it surprise any of you if I said I have no idea where February went? If you have tried to keep up with what's going on in my little corner of the world, then there's no way you could be surprised. 

In the course of the last month I have traveled from one coast to the other (within a 7 day period, actually), led two retreats, attended a conference, participated in a number of meetings, completed an interview for Vision Magazine, and tried to keep up with life at work, in community, and in vocations ministry. Needless to say, it was quite the month! Not just for me or for our community, but for our whole Church as we move into this time of transition. Oh, I forgot to mention... WE BOUGHT A HOUSE! Woo hoo!  

Today I am a little reflective about the month gone by. That is, what did I learn aside from the fact that it's probably not a good idea to go from New Jersey to California in a week....

1. There is a lot in my life for which to be grateful. Top among those are the people with whom I am blessed to share this journey. And even though my friends and family go weeks without hearing from me (in some cases, months!), I do not take them for granted. They keep me grounded... they pray for me (thank you!)... they help me laugh, to process, and in general help me stay faithful.

2. Were it not for prayer, I would be a crazy person by now. Perhaps I should say, I would be a crazier person. :) Each day I wake up at a ridiculously early time (by most people's standards). Why? If I don't spend time in personal prayer alone in the morning, I won't do it once the day gets started. This time of prayer gives me a focus... a grounding for my day. In response to someone's question about how much one should pray, St. Francis de Sales offered this word of advice, "Every Christian needs a half-hour of prayer each day, except when he is busy, then he needs an hour." To be fully honest with you, I do not spend an hour in the morning. However, I do recognize the need for a deeper prayer life when the externals of life are chaotic and/or busy. Otherwise, how would someone make it?

3. Being with the Marianist family ~ other vowed religious and lay Marianists ~ is very important to my sense of being a Marianist. No matter where I am or what I'm doing, working with other Marianists always seems right. I suppose another way to say it is, "I am because we are." When the Marianist family is working together in a common mission, ministry or endeavor it seems to me that it is the way it's supposed to be. 

4. Buying a house is a very involved and slightly stressful process. I lived on my own for several years before entering religious life, but I was a renter. Truth be told, I didn't mind apartment life, but my dad was always on my case about "throwing money away" and having nothing to show for it. Well, I am very glad that I didn't try to purchase a house when I lived alone ~ it's overwhelming! Thank you, God, for the fact that we are a community moving through this process and not just two Sisters left on their own (which brings me back to point #1).

5. Every change in the community creates a new community. In the past month, our community has seen a lot of change... and that's not going to change anytime real soon. One of our sisters, Mary Louise, moved to San Antonio. It's an odd thing not to have her around the house anymore. I could always count on her for a good laugh and playful (and often snarky) banter. She always "got" my sense of humor. Not only that, though, she is such a wise & practical presence. Then, just this past weekend, another of our sisters, Audrey, moved into assisted living at Mercy Siena - the same place to which the Marianist Brothers in the area retire. Audrey is a model for many of prayer, living the vow of poverty, and always seeking growth. So, to be without both of them is... different and I miss them. However, we also have Sisters Marcia and Estella living with us now at least for the next several weeks, which has been very good. Next week, a Brazilian Sister from our General Administration in Rome will move in with us while she studies English at the University of Dayton for a few months. Meanwhile, Marcia and I are soon to move into our new community to start our house of discernment - at which point, Estella will return to San Antonio. We're all about adaptation and change these days! And while change can be challenging and adaptation can be slow, it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. Good things are often challenging. That's my experience, anyway.

6. I am moved by the example set forth by Benedict, Pope Emeritus, stepping down from the Papacy. For me, this has been an extraordinary example of humility. I realize that opinions on his Papacy run the gamut,  but I would venture to say that few Catholics have not been effected by this almost unprecedented event. Let us continue to pray for our Church in this time of transition.

And so, there you have it. The past month in a nutshell. And while it was a full month, it was also a blessed month that was full of graced moments. I'm glad I stopped every once in a while to look around - otherwise I may have missed it.

Blessed Lent to you all!
Sr. N

Get up and eat, else the journey will be too long for you!

1 Kings 19: 7b

Our readings today bring back great memories. These were the readings for the Sunday during my retreat prior to entering the novitiate in August 2006. On that retreat (at the Jesuit retreat house in Milford, Ohio) I spent a lot of time reflection on this reading from 1 Kings - especially on that line quoted above.

The quote and my meditations on it often come back to me during busy weeks or times that my personal prayer is unfocused or scattered. For me this isn't about food, although one does need that kind of sustenance for the journey. But it's about other types of sustenance - prayer, quiet, Eucharist, friendship... those are equally important for the journey, no? Otherwise, the journey is too long, too hard, and altogether without direction. In my journal from that retreat I wrote, "Drink deeply from the wellspring of prayer, Nicole. Or this journey will be too long." And how true those words are!

Yesterday we celebrated the 70th, 60th, 50th, and 25th jubilees of many of our Marianist brothers/priests and two of our sisters. Sister Marie celebrated 60 years of vowed life and Sister Mary Louise celebrated 50 years. It was a marvelous celebration - a moving Mass with vow renewals, good music and a lot of people; a laughter-filled reception full of people I hadn't seen in months or years; and a nice dinner. It was a lovely evening, really. As each person renewed his/her vows, they also said a prayer. The prayer was a thanksgiving for God's faithfulness, asking forgiveness for their past infidelities, and requesting the grace to remain faithful for the years ahead. And what occurred to me as I watched this was that without many such prayers throughout life, the journey is just too long.

Later today I am going to a prayer vigil for the Sikh community with one of our sisters. We will gather with others from the Dayton community to pray for peace, healing, an end to senseless violence, and tragedies such as the recent shootings. What a drastically different thing to be about today compared to yesterday's joy. And yet, to me the underlying necessity of prayer stands out in both situations. The violence will not cease in our world without people of prayer working and praying for it. Yes, it takes both - hard work on behalf of peace and a disposition of prayerfulness.

And so... Drink deeply from the wellspring of prayer, my friends. Or this journey will be too long.

Many blessings to all who read this!
Sr. N