Calm in the midst...

Nothing in all creation is so like God as stillness.

Meister Eckhart

What a whirlwind summer it's been so far! It has been a summer full of blessings (which I said about last summer), but completely different from last year. The day after school was out I left for Rome (see last blog post)… Then it was off to St. Louis for a service immersion trip with students… Then Frankfort/Chicago for retreat and a workshop on Ethics in Vocation and Formation Ministry… Yesterday I arrived back to Chicago for the weeklong Orientation for New Vocation Directors. When I get home from that I'll prepare for a trip down to my beloved San Antonio for the Marianist Lay Network of North America Assembly. Then it's off to be on retreat with our 2 pre-novices. By the time that's over I'll have approximately 10 days before going back to school. So, as you can see, whirlwind is an appropriate moniker!

In the midst of the craziness I am reminded of a line from the first poem I memorized in its entirety - "Go placidly amidst the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence." The Desiderata, a prose poem by Max Ehrmann, was a gift to my 8th grade class from our language arts teacher. I have never forgotten that first line. This line, and the entire poem really, has been a constant refrain in my life. It brings peace and calm in the midst of whatever is going on. If you are not familiar with the poem, please see it below.

As mentioned above I had the opportunity to make my annual retreat in Frankfort, Illinois this summer. I moved into a hermitage on the property of the Franciscan Sisters of the Sacred Heart on a Tuesday afternoon… and immediately felt a sense of peace. The quiet and the lack of clutter provided space to reflect, pray, sing, and sleep - all the important pieces of a good retreat (for me, anyway).

Hermitage - Rivo Torto ("tortuous stream" in Italian)

While in my hermitage I had a few reflections, some mundane/trivial and others not so much…

This is how I spent most of my mornings…  

Book recommended by my spiritual director

I met with a spiritual director on 3 afternoons of the 6 1/2 days I was there. In our first meeting after she asked me to tell her a little about myself, she went to her shelf and pulled down a book - Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives (pictured above). What an eye-opening book. In this book there is a quote by Thomas Merton (the full quote is not in the book, but I find the full quote to be quite challenging), 

"To allow one's self to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit one self to too many projects, to want to help everyone in everything is to succumb to violence. Frenzy destroys our inner capacity for peace. It destroys the fruitfulness of our work, because it kills the root of inner wisdom which makes work fruitful."

Let that soak in for a minute. Violence to one self. It's strong language, no? In a world that currently has so much violence, it is difficult to see that our culture's addiction to busyness is also doing violence. I sat with that quote for a long time. I sat with the book for a long time. The book made a case (a good case) for incorporating Sabbath back into our lives. To really "Keep holy the Sabbath" - a commandment we typically ignore. Sure, going to Church on Sunday is something many of us do, but how many of us actually allow the day to be different from the other days? Allow it to be a time for renewal, friends, family, fun, relaxation? With so much to do - laundry, groceries, cleaning, yard work, grading (for those who are teachers), homework (for those who are students) - how can it be that we can incorporate Sabbath? It doesn't seem practical, does it?  But the alternative is doing violence to ourselves. Wow. My hope is that moving forward I might be able to embrace the Sabbath differently moving forward - as a first step to being a person who brings peace to situations and people.

Also in this book was an Hassidic Poem that resonated with me…

The insight? "All of your words each day are related to one another. All of them are rooted in the first words that you speak." It makes perfect sense, no? 

A mundane thing I learned while on retreat? What to do if you buy too much fresh spinach to eat in a week…

Looks gross, but sooo good!

Hmmm… liquid salad! 

Yes I finally learned to make a smoothie with a vegetable. I know I'm a little late to this craze, but I was skeptical. But this ugly concoction of blueberries, strawberries and spinach (what would normally be a salad for me) was amazingly good - and a great way to not let spinach go to waste.

I have always known that music is an important part of my spirituality, but one thing I didn't realize is how much I would long to pray in song while living in a hermitage. Why didn't I bring my guitar?! That was the question I could not figure out how to answer. But… my spiritual director came through with a special delivery one day… Her guitar! No music, but that's okay. I was able to play things I remembered from memory (many, many songs I learned early on while working with Aggie Awakening) and a few I could figure out by ear.

Her guitar and a nice note to accompany it...

Something else I learned? How to unlock this kind of lock:

That has this kind of key hole:

I had all the windows open and the ceiling fan going one day. And the breeze was strong enough to shut the bathroom door. I didn't mind that. That is until I tried to go to the bathroom and realized it was LOCKED! No key… no people around… I was worried. I still had days of retreat to go - what the heck was I going to do without a bathroom!? The more things I tried the more I really needed in that little room. Luckily I'm pretty handy with a pair of scissors. That was an adventure…

I spend time with Pope Francis on retreat as well. I finally finished reading Lumen Fidei and re-reading Evangelii Gaudium. And I think it would do me a little good to read them again. Some things you can't read enough times.

And so, there you have it. A small update on summer and some insights gained. As promised the poem Desiderata is below my signature.

I pray that each of you may be richly blessed.
Blessings,
Sr. N

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; 

and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.Keep interested in your career, however humble; 

it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be critical about love; 

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. 

But do not distress yourself with imaginings.Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. 

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. 

Be careful. Strive to be happy.

© Max Ehrmann 1927

...nor shall they train for war again.

... they shall beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks;

one nation shall not raise the sword against another, 

nor shall they train for war again.

Isaiah 2: 4b-c

Would you believe me if I wrote that I've started several blog posts in the past month... but never had the time/took the time to finish them? It's a little ridiculous, really. I'm not sure I can name why I seem to put off blogging. Maybe it's because I treat my Facebook account as a blog. I suppose it serves the same purpose on some levels. However, as long as those posts can be (and those that follow me know that I am quite verbose!) they can't really take the place of a longer blog.

To say that there has been a lot going on in life, ministry, community, etc. would be an understatement of major proportions. What's been occupying my time? Glad you asked... Some of this may be a recap for you, but bear with me.

Some of you may be aware that I moved into a new community a little over 7 months ago. This community, Annunciation House, is a house of discernment - a place where women who are discerning the possibility of Marianist religious life can live for several weeks up to a year. And while this is our main ministry as a community, we also have our fair share of short term (2 or 3 days) visitors - most of whom are discerning with our community. This has been a graced development in the life of our Province. We currently have a discerning woman living with us and will soon have a second... plus several short term discerners. Our community life is rich - with shared meals and conversations about many things (poverty in the US, the call of the Gospel, faith, prayer, the news, ministry, work etc), prayer, Mass, and many community outings (AppleFest anyone?). We do live a grace-filled life.

Also, I am now working at 2 part time ministries. And in case you were not aware, this is a case where 1/2 plus 1/2 actually equals 1-3/4. It's crazy math, I know, but it's true! I currently teach 3 classes of 10th grade religion... which I love! I so enjoy teaching Scripture. I wouldn't consider myself a Scripture scholar, but I am a lover of Scripture and therefore have studied and prayed with Scripture a lot. My students do not always share my love of Scripture, but that's okay. At least many of them find some things in class interesting or challenging or even inspiring (although, that doesn't happen as often as I would like!). My other part time ministry is serving as vocations director for our Sisters and vocations coordinator for the Marianists in Dayton (both for the Sisters and for the Brothers/Priests). That's been really good, too, I think. I enjoy it and it's been fulfilling.

So, that's a brief update on life these days. Mix that in with traveling for conferences, vocation discernment events, getting together with friends, grading papers, going for morning walks (or the occasional run), and trying to motivate myself to finish writing thank you notes (I will be done by Christmas) you can see it's a full life. But it is a rich and blessed life. I wouldn't have it any other way.

And in the midst of everything, there is peace - a sure sign that God is part of this life I live.

Now, finally, I come to the quote at the top of this blog. This quote has been playing in my mind over and over again since yesterday. Allow me to explain...

Our community typically goes to a 7 AM Mass Monday - Friday with a community of Marianist Brothers/Priests at the University of Dayton (a Catholic Marianist university). Yesterday morning, just like everyone morning, I was chatting with someone on the way out of the chapel. As we walked towards the parking lot we saw a line of about 10 ROTC guys in their BDUs (camouflage uniforms) with automatic weapons. They were doing an exercise whereby they stealthily cross an area, then drop to the ground and practice firing by raising their weapons and yelling, "bang, bang, bang-bang-bang." It was a very disturbing post-Mass site. As we crossed the parking lot, one of our Sisters was standing in the parking lot - very still - and watching the men. I asked if she was waiting to talk to someone. Her response, "I'm praying for those guys."

Leaving campus on my way to the high school, I passed another Marianist community. The Brothers were gathered in their chapel praying morning prayer together. As I drove by I thought that at that moment they might be praying the Benedictus. One line of the Benedictus states, "In the tender compassion of our God the dawn from on high shall break upon us, to shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death, and to guide our feet into the way of peace."

Peace. God will guide us into the way of peace. When, O Lord?

As I continued my short morning commute, it struck me that what I saw on my way out of Mass may have been disturbing, but what about people who see this everyday - and the weapons are not empty? It reminded me of being in El Salvador a few years ago and how common it is to see military men with loaded automatic weapons standing around on street corners as if it's no big deal. It reminded me of all the places in our world that face violence and war constantly. They live in fear - constantly. Again, I thought of the line from the Benedictus and asked, "When?"

Last night I finished reading a novel set in World War II Germany. The novel is written from the perspective of death personified. Death was the narrator. And while the book was very well written and a good read, I couldn't help but think of the fact that for so many people in our world, death is a daily part of living. And that fact does not sit well with me.

There is now a peace pole on the campus of UD. It seems odd that the peace pole and the ROTC guys share the same campus. My prayer is that peace will prevail... and we will train for war no longer.

Photo courtesy of the University of Dayton

Many blessings to all who read this,
Sr. N

What is the peace for which we pray?

Peace is not the product of terror or fear. Peace is not the silence of cemeteries.

Peace is not the silent result of violent repression.

Peace is the generous, tranquil contribution of all to the good of all.

Peace is dynamism. Peace is generosity. 

It is right and it is duty

Oscar Romero, Martyred Archbishop of El Salvador

Today marks a month since my last blog post. There has been so much good and so many things that I've wanted to share with you through a blog post. The past several weeks have certainly brought their share of blessings : the beginning of the academic year - on 2 campuses, the growth of our community at Annunciation House of Discernment, thoughtful conversations with friends both near and far, and more about my summer adventures. Oh, so much to share with you!

However, today I find myself unable to focus on those things - as good as they are. No. Today I am contemplating peace and the lack thereof. Contemplating why there is so much trouble in human hearts, violence in many places of our world, young people in our schools and on our streets who do unthinkable acts of violence out of boredom (...or depression... or rage), the lack of respectful discourse in our political landscape... and the list goes on.

For many years these things have troubled and saddened me a great deal. This is not the way God intended our world to be. This is not the Kingdom of which Jesus said, "the Kingdom of God is in your midst." Don't get me wrong. There is a lot of good in the world and in my life. And for that, I am more grateful than words can adequately express. It is the good in our world and in human hearts that can allow us to hope. And "hope does not disappoint."

There is a saying, "The Kingdom of God is already and not yet." And while I've always understood this from an intellectual, theoretical point of view, I never thought much about the practical implications. But it is true. The Kingdom of God does exist here wherever there is goodness, love, compassion, faith and peace. But to the extent that there exists violence, hatred, war, oppression, indifference to the suffering of others, then the Kingdom has a long way to go.

In his Angelus address on Sunday, September 1, Pope Francis asked that all people of goodwill take tomorrow (Saturday, September 7) as a day of prayer and fasting for peace. He called us to be men and women of peace and to ask God to grant us the great gift of peace in our world. Indeed. However, what is this peace of which we speak? 

Pope Francis went on to state, "It is neither a culture of confrontation nor a culture of conflict which builds harmony within and among peoples, but rather a culture of encounter and a culture of dialogue; this is the only way to peace." A culture of encounter and a culture of dialogue. How can we begin to build this culture and promote its growth? Cultural change is never easy, nor is it swift. 

I am reminded of a song from GIA (the publisher of the ubiquitous Gather hymnals), Do Not Fear to Hope. Allow me to share with you a few lines:

Do not fear to hope! Though the wicked rage and rise. For God sees not as we see. Success is not the prize. Do not fear to hope! For though the night be long,the race shall not be to the swift, the fight not to the strong.

No. The culture of encounter and of dialogue that leads to lasting peace will not happen quickly - especially if we always seek to "win" or to "succeed." The win-lose mentality is not one that promotes peace. Nor is the culture of peace build by people who only seek their own success regardless of the implications for others. These mentalities are so prevalent all around us, but it is certainly not a hopeless situation...

If we feel it is hopeless, we are underestimating many things. One, we underestimate the power of prayer. Sometimes people become discouraged in prayer - "I prayed for thus-and-such and nothing happened." And perhaps it's true that a situation doesn't change immediately. But what always happens is that those who pray are changed - hearts are opened, insight given, courage and strength to continue to do the right thing.... Second, I believe we underestimate what a small group of people can bring about. Sociologist Margaret Mead once wrote, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." People say it so often that it's become cliche, but just because it's cliche doesn't mean it's not true. Lastly, it seems to me that people can sometimes underestimate what God can do. For what might seem impossible to us, is possible for God. Do we have the courage to trust that?

Tomorrow evening I will gather with faculty, staff, students and other Marianists (lay and religious) at the University of Dayton for a vigil for peace. And as we pray for peace in our troubled world and peace in human hearts, I will also pray that we not forget our role in building peace.  

Peace to the hearts of all who read this.

Sr. N

A summer full of grace...

... it is not merely enough to piously desire holiness; 

we have to take means to put it in motion. 

We must get rid of all that might jeopardize or destroy 

the fullness of Jesus' life within us - a hard and long work of renunciation, 

but one that can be accomplished with the help of Mary. 

We must conform our ways of thinking, feeling, willing and acting to those of Jesus 

- a still harder and longer task... 

All this presupposes that we keep Mary in the midst of our spiritual work.... 

Without her, we cannot succeed; with her, we cannot fail.

Fr. Emile Neubert, SM

Devotion to Mary

Much grace and peace to you!
I hope you have a little time on your hands... this one's rather lengthy!

It's been a while since my last post. It seems that most of my posts in the past several months start with that statement. With the ending of the school year and all it that it involves, I wasn't able to post before embarking on my almost 30-day retreat. Yes, that's correct. This summer I was on retreat, in preparation for my final vows, for close to 30 days. It was mostly silent, but not completely. I talked to people at meals and had a few hours of frivolity (watching the Spurs, of course!). But mostly, I spent the majority of my days in prayer... reading... journaling... and exploring my prayer daily with 1-hour meetings with Sr. Gretchen who guided my retreat.

So, what exactly does one contemplate over the course of nearly 30 days? Well, to launch into detail, I would have to reproduce my journal from the experience. I filled almost every page of a brand new journal and used all of the ink a new pen.  Therefore, I will spare you every detail.

The name of the retreat is the Spirit of Saragossa. It is a retreat designed specifically for Marianists (male and female religious branches) around the world as we prepare for final vows. The name of it comes from the fact that one of our Founders, Blssd. William Joseph Chaminade, received inspiration to found the Marianist Family while in prayer before Our Lady of the Pillar in Saragossa, Spain. The retreat, then is meant to tap into that spirit of devotion that inspired WJC.


The retreat began with a week long all-province retreat. Most of our Sisters were able to join us at the Holy Name Passionist Retreat Center in Houston (which I highly recommend - beautiful property and the best "retreat food" I've ever had). The retreat was like doing the whole 30 days in a week. It was very fruitful for us as a group and for me as an individual.

One of the many beautiful gardens at the retreat house.

Our Sisters on retreat.
Along with Bro.  Les who was a co-presenter with Sr. Gretchen and Fr. Tim who was our chaplain.

The focus of the retreat is the Marianist vow of stability - the fourth vow that we take in addition to the vows of poverty, chastity and obedience that all religious take. There are other congregations that profess a vow of stability - that is to remain in their monastery for the rest of their lives. However, being that I belong to an apostolic congregation, the meaning is different for us.

Marianist stability is about a fundamental relationship - our relationship with Mary. Mary who is our mother, our model, our support and the means through which we are brought to Jesus. Marianist vow to  love and be devoted to Mary and to her mission - to bring forth and to nurture Jesus in our world. It's more than that, however. And it's the "more than that" that I find difficult to articulate.

On this retreat I spend several days on each of 4 mysteries of Mary - Mary at the annunciation, Mary at the foot of the cross, Mary in the Cenacle with the apostles awaiting the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, and Mary at Cana who says to us, "Do whatever he tells you." With each mystery there was a certain focus: the call to stability as a permanent commitment (annunciation), stability as love for Mary and living as the beloved disciple (Calvary), stability as love for the Daughters of Mary (Marianist Sisters) and the importance of our relationship in community with Mary (Cenacle), and stability as sharing in Mary's mission of giving Christ to the world (Cana).

The Marianist Sisters profess stability at first vows. However, I can honestly say that stability means more to me now than it did at that time or at anytime during temporary vows. The book I quoted at the top of the page, Devotion to Mary, was written by a French Marianist Priest in the 50s. I read it while I was on retreat because it fit so well into the purpose of the retreat. That book, combined with the grace-filled times of prayer, has had a significant effect on my spirituality and my relationships with both Jesus and Mary, but Mary especially... I will leave it at that.

On a few occasions, during the private portion of my retreat, I ventured from our house in San Antonio, to other locations for prayer. On one such day I went to Boerne (pronounced "burn-ie"... it's German, I think). It was during one of the days that I spent with Mary in the Cenacle - praying for openness to the Spirit and for union with our Sisters around the world.

Sitting at Cibilo Creek...
 this was before I got lost trying to find the car. 

You have to know... Boerne is one of my favorite little Texas cities. While there, I went to Cibilo Creek Nature Center and sat by the creek for a while... watching the butterflies and enjoying an atypical cool breeze. I saw a deer on my way to the creek and beautiful wildflowers. Then... on what should have been my 10 minute walk back to the car, I got totally lost... and ended up walking for an hour. But it was okay, had I not gotten lost, I never would have stumbled upon a great little "water fall"...

This picture does not do it justice.

Isn't that a great metaphor for life? You can have plans... and if you follow your plans exactly, you might miss something beautiful.

Once I finally left the park and had some lunch. I went to pray in one of my favorite Churches in Texas - St. Peter the Apostle in Boerne.

The openness, the sound of the baptismal font... it 's a very peaceful place.
It's a great place to contemplate being open to the Spirit.

This is the Eucharistic chapel at St. Peter's..

While I was praying - asking for openness to the
Holy Spirit, I looked over my should to the left... and this is what I saw.

When I was a novice, on my "desert days" I would sometimes drive out to Boerne just to sit in this Church while I prayed. The windows on the left side of the picture face out onto large hills (or small mountains?) - a beautiful site.

Before I knew it, the retreat was over. A month can go by very quickly. Especially when it is full of grace and many blessings. I finished the retreat exactly one month before my final vows. That was a significant day. One month before I say "yes" for the rest of my life to Mary's mission, to Jesus, in union of life with our Sisters. 

Both Blssd. William Joseph Chaminade and our Foundress, Adele de Batz de Trenquelleon said that as daughters (and sons, for the Society of Mary) of Mary we should be ready to go to the ends of the world if God so calls us. To this, I say yes!

I had planned to discuss other aspects of my summer in this blog... but it is already quite lengthy. I will blog again soon. However, this is probably the last time my blog will carry this title "The Life of a New Sister." As my friend, George, pointed out to me, "New sister?? Don't you think it's time to change the name? I mean, you've been around forever!" So, the name will change... 

Many blessings to all who read this,

Sr. N

The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; 

upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone.

You have brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing....

Isaiah 9:1

Merry Christmas!

When I was younger, maybe in late middle school and through high school, I loved going to Midnight Mass. It didn't matter whether I went to my home parish of St. Mary's or the parish of many of my friends, St. Francis of Assisi. I loved that Mass. There was something magical and special about it.

Last night I was sitting in our Immaculate Conception Chapel at the University of Dayton at the "Midnight Mass at 10:30 PM" reflecting on the celebration. I was reflecting on something that I didn't quite get growing up. What's special about celebrating the incarnation so late at night? Why does it speak to me so? We gather during the darkest hour to celebrate the fact that into the darkness has come the greatest of Lights. God has chosen to enter our world. Our world is good, for all things created by God are good. However, our world has its share of dark moments and people who walk in darkness. Our own lives have their share of dark days or dark times. And it is into this reality of ours that God enters. If we let that soak in... touch our hearts... it's an awesome reality.

And what does that mean for us today? Meister Eckhart, a late 13th / early 14th century German Dominican priest, philosopher and theologian once wrote:

We are all meant to be mothers of God. What good is it to me if this eternal birth of the divine Son takes place unceasingly, but does not take place within myself? And, what good is it to me if Mary is full of grace if I am not also full of grace? What good is it to me for the Creator to give birth to his Son if I do not also give birth to him in my time and my culture? This, then, is the fullness of time: When the Son of Man is begotten in us.

Indeed, how Marianist of him!

Our world and our lives are still in need of light - of joy - peace - comfort - love. What good is it if Jesus came then, but does not also come through us now? This is our call: to be Christ-bearers in our world today. That is very much in keeping with a Marianist perspective. For, as Marianists, we see our mission as continuing the mission that is Mary's - manifesting Christ in our world.

Celebrating today is important. It is important for us to remember that God became one of us out of God's great love for us. However, it does us no good as a people if our celebrations end today and have no lasting meaning into the days ahead. So, let us carry the celebration of Christmas forward so that Christ might be born in each day.

Many blessings for a peaceful and joy-filled Christmas,
Sr. N

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, 

heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience,

bearing with one another and forgiving one another...

And over all these, put on love, that is the bond of perfection.

And let the peace of Christ control your hearts, the peace to which you were also called in one body.

And be thankful.

Colossians 3: 12-13a, 14 - 15

Ever since I was in high school, these words to the Colossians have held great meaning for me... somewhat like a compass or a guidebook. However, I have never found these words very easy to live by. Recently, I've been reflecting a lot about gratitude - not necessarily because of Thanksgiving, but that is a nice coincidence. :)

In the past few months I've invited a few of my colleagues and friends to begin a women's faith sharing group. We're fairly fluid in the way we've organized ourselves, but it's coming together. At our last gathering our focus was cultivating gratitude - how do we build a sense of thankfulness into our lives and live from that? One of the suggestions was to begin a gratitude journal - beginning each day by simply making a list of all the things one is grateful for that day. I did not take up that suggestion, although I like it. It seems to me that if I made a list of everything for which I am grateful, I'd run out of space fairly quickly!

God's blessings have certainly been abundant in my life - supportive family and friends, my community and the Marianist family... opportunities for travel and for education... ministry and service with and for young people... the lessons learned through tears and sorrow... laughter and hikes in beautiful spaces. Yes, I have been abundantly blessed in this life.

I'm sure all of us could recount many experiences and people for which we are grateful. And yet, in our society it is difficult to hold on to that gratitude. Our culture seems set up to make us believe that we do not have enough, we aren't good looking enough, our friends need to be a certain way... basically, that we and our lives are just not enough. There's always something telling us we need to buy this latest thing to make our lives more complete or more worthwhile. Of course, it's all craziness! Yes, there are many people who lack basic necessities and who really do need certain things. However, if we're honest with ourselves many of us who have access to the internet to read this post are not in that circumstance. But, we do have a call to be more like those who go without than to be like our culture encourages us to be.

A reflection I was reading recently states that the beginning of gratitude is recognition of our absolute dependance on God - for it is God who gifts us so abundantly and it is God alone who can bring peace to our restless hearts (and therefore our restless world). And until we realize that all good things come from God and not from the big sales at the mall, true and lasting gratitude will continue to be elusive to us.

Now, one might think that as a religious with a vow of poverty I might be somehow immune from the materialism and consumerism that is rampant in our culture. I do wish that were true! But, I, like you, am human and not perfect.  I do, however, recognize it as an issue and when I see it creeping into my life it does bring me to reflect on my vows, on the goodness of God... and then to laugh at my forgetfulness.

May this time of giving thanks be for each of you a time to cultivate deep gratitude... and may you know the abundance of God's love for you.

Blessings to all who read this,
Sr. N

Get up and eat, else the journey will be too long for you!

1 Kings 19: 7b

Our readings today bring back great memories. These were the readings for the Sunday during my retreat prior to entering the novitiate in August 2006. On that retreat (at the Jesuit retreat house in Milford, Ohio) I spent a lot of time reflection on this reading from 1 Kings - especially on that line quoted above.

The quote and my meditations on it often come back to me during busy weeks or times that my personal prayer is unfocused or scattered. For me this isn't about food, although one does need that kind of sustenance for the journey. But it's about other types of sustenance - prayer, quiet, Eucharist, friendship... those are equally important for the journey, no? Otherwise, the journey is too long, too hard, and altogether without direction. In my journal from that retreat I wrote, "Drink deeply from the wellspring of prayer, Nicole. Or this journey will be too long." And how true those words are!

Yesterday we celebrated the 70th, 60th, 50th, and 25th jubilees of many of our Marianist brothers/priests and two of our sisters. Sister Marie celebrated 60 years of vowed life and Sister Mary Louise celebrated 50 years. It was a marvelous celebration - a moving Mass with vow renewals, good music and a lot of people; a laughter-filled reception full of people I hadn't seen in months or years; and a nice dinner. It was a lovely evening, really. As each person renewed his/her vows, they also said a prayer. The prayer was a thanksgiving for God's faithfulness, asking forgiveness for their past infidelities, and requesting the grace to remain faithful for the years ahead. And what occurred to me as I watched this was that without many such prayers throughout life, the journey is just too long.

Later today I am going to a prayer vigil for the Sikh community with one of our sisters. We will gather with others from the Dayton community to pray for peace, healing, an end to senseless violence, and tragedies such as the recent shootings. What a drastically different thing to be about today compared to yesterday's joy. And yet, to me the underlying necessity of prayer stands out in both situations. The violence will not cease in our world without people of prayer working and praying for it. Yes, it takes both - hard work on behalf of peace and a disposition of prayerfulness.

And so... Drink deeply from the wellspring of prayer, my friends. Or this journey will be too long.

Many blessings to all who read this!
Sr. N